Personal Development | Emotional Intelligence | Self-Awareness | Growth Mindset | Social Skills | Practical Skills
However unlikely it may seem, this creative outlet might be for you. I would have laughed if you told me I’d become a writer. It was as unexpected as the feral tuxedo cat that turned my life upside down some years ago. Like him, writing chose me. But that’s the thing about life’s greatest gifts: they choose us, not the other way around.
I didn’t know I wanted or needed him until he crept into my life. Being the softy I am, I put food out daily in the wooden shelter my husband built to keep him warm and dry in the rainy winter months. He was wild, darting off when I peeked through the kitchen window as he came for his food. This was our relationship for a few years, only glimpses of a black shadow that thanked me for my kindness with dirty bedding and empty bowls.
Read more: The Art of Being Chosen: A Tale of Writing, A Cat, and Finding Your Adventure
I was shocked to discover that I’m a highly sensitive person (HSP). A few years ago, someone gifted me Dr. Elaine N. Aron’s book, The Highly Sensitive Person. It was my first encounter with this personality trait, and it described me perfectly. Initially, the word ‘sensitive’ put me off due to its negative connotations; in my mind, it equated to weakness.
An HSP is someone who processes sensory information more deeply than others. This trait, affecting about 15–20% of the population, is characterized by heightened awareness, emotional reactivity, and a tendency to become overwhelmed in stimulating environments.
Looking back, I see my journey and where I could have done things differently. Here, I share some of my HSP journey to help you find your way.
Read more: Reframing Sensitivity: 6 Steps to Harnessing Your HSP Traits
As your matric year concludes, life gets more complicated. Standing in a group listening to everyone’s plans for after school can make you nervous. It seems like everyone has it figured out except for you.
It’s your turn to give your elevator pitch, but you know it’s not exactly what you want to do. This often happens in the final years of school.
Friends, teachers, family, and everyone else keep asking, “What are your plans after matric?”
This is something that I struggle with a lot. So maybe I’m not the “expert” that should be writing about this topic. But considering that the whole point of this article is to let go of who and what you think you should be, I might just be the right person for the job. Because I get you, I’ve been there and understand the frustration of feeling like you don’t measure up and know what it feels like to constantly compare yourself to others.
This is a story of how a horse brought me back to connection—a wonderful highlight in my life. A brush with nature, unexpectedly revealing a side of myself thought to have been lost forever.
This is my tribute to nature, to softness and a grey horse.
I now appreciate every moment because I know it's a gift and not a given.
Death stared me in the face yet again, this time the two most important men in my life at once. Sitting in the coffee shop in the hospital, my Father in ICU with Covid and my husband in the emergency room going through all sorts of tests after having, what they suspected was a heart attack right next to me on the plane on our way to see my Dad in hospital.
How well you live comes down to how much you love.
– Robin Sharma
This quote struck deep into my heart. I’ve built up so many things in my head about what life is about, but it truly is this simple. Love.
I used to think the purpose of life is about finding meaning, living a good life, making a contribution, and being content. I guess I wasn’t that far off. What greater meaning could there be than to love and be loved in return?
At the end of high school, I seriously considered taking a gap year. Can you guess what was one of the main reactions this desire elicited? Usually, shock, often confusion, and usually followed by an assumption that (gasp) you don’t have everything figured out at the ripe old age of 18.